Friday, October 10, 2008

...TEMAN MAMA G HOSPITAL..

Assalamualaikum bersua kembali..

like been said b4 disebabkan takda internet kat umah so aku baru le nak cita kt korang apa yang berlaku when i'm home..

29.5.08

pagi tu bangun awal..dalam kul 4 lebih la..tak pasti jamnye..sebab mama aku gerak terus g mandi nak bersiap g ampang teman mamaku g hospital ampang..lepas mandi g sahur jap..waktu sahur baru perasan sepupuku,angah dah sampai kat kuala..dia bertolak malam dari kajang balik kuala kangsar entah pukul berapa la dia sampai..

then lepas sahur,me,mama ngan abah pun bertolak ke kl..
on d way tu berenti kat perhentian tol g solat subuh dulu..kami berenti kat perhentian tol tapah..cantik la surau dia..cam nature lover ja ada banyak pokok2 surrounding tempat solat tu..

lepas tu sambung bertolak..dalam kul 9(tak salah aku la,aku bab jam ni memang lemah ckit,lebih2 sejak jam pemberian mama sempena result elok waktu matrik dulu dah buat perangai so tuan dia pun wat perangai malas nak ambik tahu hehehe)camtu sampai la kami ke tempat yang dituju..

aku pun teman mama g tingkat 3..tempat mama ada appointment doktor nak wat bone marrow..lama gak la tunggu..sambil2 tunggu sembang2 kosong ngan mama sambil2 tu sempat gak aku belek buku kecik oxford clinical medicine kesayangan aku tu..semapat le baca ckit2 pasal penyakit mamaku that is CML(chronic myeloid leukaemia..

ok aku brief ckit history of disease mamaku ni..
PAST MEDICAL HISTORY
mama dah dapat penyakit ni sejak aku form 1 lagi..jadi dah lebih kurang 7 tahun yang lalu..memang lama..kalu cita pasal previous treatment dah berbelas kali mama wat bone marrow tu..dulu aku ingat lagi masa 1st time mama nak wat bone marrow that have to take ckit la air sumsum pak ngah(my mother's father),ramai gak yang bangkang becoz of layman punya pemikiran..ramai cam takut2 kan..ada orang cakap bone marrow ni boleh menyebabkan lumpuh la,terencat akal la,all sort of thing yang betul2 menakutkan me as a daughter of my mother at that time..sampai sekarang aku tak tahu kebenaran kata-kata orang,is it really happen atau hanya kata-kata orang yang tiada bukti..tah la..yang penting alhamdulilah sepanjang mama buat no really bad effect happened..other than that mama pernah wat some operation yang aku tak brapa pasti la..one more as a cancer patient my mother also had many chemotheraphy..its really hurt for her and for me and for us one family..how at that time our family like been broken up..my mather at kl doing treatment,my father ulang-alik from penang to kl,me at hostel,my brother ayin stay at his friend house as at that time he in upsr year so its difficult for him change school like my brother irfan and my sis inat do at that time,irfan and inat change school and stay at my mother's kg at bandar bharu with mak ngah so that someone can take care of them..its really a hard year for all of us..then it been cured but cancer never die it comes again so that's why my mother has to do bone marrow again..

about family history,my father has hypertension,while my grandmother that is my mother's mother had died bcoz of bone cancer..so it is genetic problem..maybe me the one who will inherited this disease after this..who knows???

i feel really grateful to teman my mother to hospital that day bcoz i have learn so many things..banyak benda tak brapa tahu pasal penyakit mama so when i look with my own eyes aku dapat rasakan kesakitan and ketakutan mama.. it feel really close to my mom as i waited for her beside her bed..secara jujurnya i'm not a good daughter actually,aku selalu gak tak dengar cakap..mama,maafkan ain ye..but still my mother is a mother..ada naluri keibuan walaubagaimana degilnya anak dia yang sorang ni but still she loves me for what i am..thank you,mama..and one more thing pasal penyakit mama ni and her treatment ni aku tak banyak sangat tahu sebenarnya..satu hal mama agak perahsia orangnya kalu bab penyakit dia..its always abah yang selalu bercerita how mama's condition,camna perasaan mama and all sort of things that somehow shows that abah really loves and cares for mama..really love abah for what he is..somehow aku selalu fikir no one is perfect but still my abah is perfect for what he is,how he cares and loves my mama although at that time mama is sick,baldy not so pretty anymore but still he loves she for what she is..really love my abah..kadang2 terlintas di fikiranku mana la nak cari lelaki sebaik ni kat dunia ni sekarang..sepanjang aku hidup 19 tahun ni lebih2 lagi sejak masuk medical field ni yang aku dengar selalu sangat si lelaki ni tinggalkan his wife bcoz his wife got some disease and he feel burden,yang peliknya bila si lelaki yang dapat penyakit takda pulak si wife tinggalkan dia,so is it the problem is laki yang takda hati perut or perempuan yang terlalu baik hati???tah la malas la nak kembangkan isu ni..

then the bone marrow happen..i juz waiting outside..then after the bone marrow thing finish,i went back to my mom..mama tido je sbb doktor ada bagi ubat tidur for the bone marrow..bila mama bangun she says to me "mama sakit"..mama kata lagi sebelum ni dia wat bone marrow tak sakit pun maybe the doctor is not so good..before my mother there is one patient undergo bone marrow by the same doctor in front of my mother's bed..it takes so long than usual and we can tell that the doctor is not so efficient in doing bone marrow..

then,mama tido..memang mama nampak sakit+letih sangat waktu tu..so aku sembang ngan abah je la masa tu..and dia mula la bercakapa about medical things with me..masalahnya dia cakap benda yang aku tak blaja lagi..mula la en. amiruddin jadi doktor yang cik ain sabrina pulak jadi patient aka pendengar setia..hehehe

then bila mama cam dah ok ckit,km g tingkat 7 g jumpa doctor..lama gak aa kat ctu sebab ada 2-3 patient tgh tggu giliran nak jumpa doc..at there i met ramai patient yang ada disease lebih kurang cam mama gak..then kami pun bersembang-sembang la dengan patient yg ada..ada la sorang patient ni baya2 aku je has an acute leukimia..i love her courage..dia nampak bersemangat walaupun dengan sakitnya..kalu aku mungkin tak setabah itu..semoga Allah merahmatinya..

when jumpa doc,he has agood news..dia kata condition mama dah ok ckit..bulan november ni datang lagi sekali hospital kalu ok gak,it means good so my mama don't have to come once a month but come once in 3 month.. :-)

then kami pun balik..masa balik abah ada mintak tolong aku drive kejap..aku cam takut2 gak sebenarnya aku selalu bw keta kancil or kelisa yang sauz kecik2 je tetiba suruh bawa pesona yang agak gedabak tu..takut gak la..tapi bawa je la..tapi tak lama pas aku bawa,tetiba hujan turun dengan lebatnya..serius lebat sesangat sampai tak nampak jalan juz nampak lampu2 keta..then,aku memang rasa takut sengat la..disebabkan ketakutan aku ditambah pulak dengan ketidakpercayaaan keupayaan ku mendrive jadi driver ditukar kembali,bp aku mabik alih balik tugas driver dia hehehe
ain sabrina memang agak penakut sebenarnya..takda la takut sangat but still hujan tu betul2 merencatkan kerjaya driver aku hehehe

2 pengomen:

ShahRezaL

hua2.. reali nice post.. sob sob sedih dgr cite luahan ati ain nie..
hmm kite masing2 ade cabaran dlm idop kn? seteruk2 kite ada lg yg lebeh sufer dr kite kn?

hmm kdg2 benda2 nie kacau dlm pemikiran kite tmbh2 kite skng in medical studies.. sgt2 berat n things hapen dat buat kite ilang focus kadg2..

mcm rizal kt india nie dok pk adik2 kt msia.. rindu arwah makcik.. hmm bt then life must go on..

n one thing blog is da best way of relift kn?

hmm rajin2 jengok2 la blog rizal lak..
ok samekom take care rite!!~

a.s.m.a

cabaran dalam hidup yang mematangkan kita..sesungguhnya ujian itu tanda ALLAH kasih pada kita,insyALLAH..

Pasal adik2,ain faham..ain yang duk kelate saja ni pun ckit2 rndu ckit fon umah,fon adik tambah lagi rizal yang nun jauh disana tu..yang ain boleh tolong juz contact iya ngan farah je la tu pn kadang2 sgt sbb agak bz la..setiap kali ain msg or fon ayin bg semangat at the same time time ain cuba msg or fon iya bagi support..tu je yang ain mampu..at the same time rasa cam risau lak ain menganggu iya takut cam pressure dia lak..cam ayin dia memang suka ain msg or fon bg kata2 semangat ingatkan dia tp iya ain tak tahu la..ain pun rasa serba salah sebenarnya..rizal rasa camna???


ainsabrina mencabar dirinya sendiri.
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